The Fear of Change:
Fear of change is something we are all scared of. It's a common struggle at some point in our lives, the challenge of transforming into the version of ourselves we aspire to be. Today, we're tackling the unseen forces holding you back from change and offering actionable steps to help you make that change.
The Need for Change:
First, why do you need to change? Continuing as you are is an option. But clearly, there's a reason for your desire to change. It's likely because you're not satisfied with your current life. You have this known or unknown desire to improve. Perhaps your finances, health, relationships, or work—whatever aspect of your life—is not where you want it to be.
Vision vs. Reality: Understanding the Gap:
Though not always well-defined, we have some idea of what we want. Healthier, wealthier, or more fulfilled in our jobs. It's natural to aspire for the better.
Having a vision of an ideal self gives you a target to aim for. Without a target, life is aimless, like embarking on a road trip with no destination.
But this vision creates a gap between your current reality and the person you desire to be, leading to anxiety, depression, or stress for some, as it may seem a mountain of change is required.
Taking Responsibility: The First Step to Change:
the gap and the reasons behind your dissatisfaction is the first step to change. It's about understanding that life as it is now is a direct result of your decisions. If you're blaming others—be it people or circumstances—you're playing the victim. Victims live miserably because they don't take responsibility, believing they're at the mercy of external factors.
The alternative? Take responsibility. Acknowledge that your life's current state is due to your actions, decisions, habits, and outlook. Victims don't realise that taking responsibility is the first step to regaining control of their lives. Even if life throws uncontrollable challenges at you, your response is within your control. Your ability to respond—your "response-ability"—is your power to change your reality.
The Cycle of Thoughts, Feelings, and Actions
Taking responsibility for your life opens up the possibility of change. If you're unhappy with your current situation, something different needs to happen. Continuing the same thoughts, actions, and feelings will yield the same results. Our thoughts influence our feelings, our feelings dictate our behaviours, and our behaviours shape our reality.
Breaking the Cycle: The Need for Change:
For instance, attempting to lose weight can be thwarted by negative self-talk, leading to a cycle of negative thoughts, feelings, and behaviours. Our brains, wired for consistency and survival, resist change because it's unpredictable. This resistance keeps us stuck in negative habits, but recognising the need for change is crucial.
Defining the New You: The Science of behaviour Change
To change, we must first be clear on who we want to become. Without a clear target, change is directionless. Start by writing down who you would be without your worries and concerns. This exercise clarifies your vision and sets the stage for self-discovery.
From Past to Present: Understanding Your Current Self
Understanding how past experiences and upbringing have shaped you is essential. We're born as blank slates, and our early years shape our worldview. Recognising that many of our beliefs and behaviours are inherited allows us to discern which ones serve us and which don't.
The Path to the Authentic Self: A Journey of Discovery
Embarking on a journey to discover your authentic self requires facing the parts of you that are painful to look at. It's about shining light on the shadows holding you back and embracing the process of healing and self-discovery. Recognising that you are not your thoughts, past conditioning, or body, but a being of infinite potential, is the key to living a life aligned with your true essence.
Living Your Truth
This journey of self-discovery and alignment with your authentic self is not just about personal fulfilment. It's about assuming your role in the world, deepening your relationships, and accessing a life of abundance, happiness, and joy. Remember, the essence of who you are is everything you need and more. Embrace the journey to discover and live as your highest self.
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